5 Ways You Can Positively Model Self-Love for Your Child

Screen Shot 2021-03-04 at 2.46.45 PM.png

5 Ways You Can Positively Model Self-Love for Your Child

by: Jasmine Dedrick

Growing up, who shaped your idea of self-love & confidence? More than likely it was a parent, or another important adult-figure in your life. The Psychology Today article, Your Child’s Self-Esteem Starts With You, speaks to the very influence parents/guardians have on a child’s self-confidence when it says, “Every reaction we express (consciously and unconsciously) is absorbed by them, helping them shape their view of the world and of themselves.” Valentine’s Day was recently celebrated all across the globe! And that day is all about love - giving and receiving it in various ways. But one thing that came to mind that day, that’s just as important as giving and receiving love, if not more, is the love we show ourselves, day in and day out. And it’s so important that we’re intentional on doing that well! You know we love lists around here, so here are five positive examples you can set, this week, that will have the impact of a lifetime on your little one(s).

Speak (to Yourself) in Love - How would you speak to your best friend if they were dealing with the same thing? Speak to yourself in the same manner. Be gracious. Speak positively about yourself (inward and outward). In moments of self-doubt, encourage yourself. Made a mistake? Own up to it & move forward with a hopeful attitude that you’ll get things right, next time. This allows your child to see that our mistakes don’t define us. It’s how we respond to them and the lessons we learn from them, that matter most.

Prioritize Your Health (Physical and Mental) - According to healthguide.org, exercise is not only good for physical health but the benefits for mental health include: sharper memory, higher self-esteem, better sleep, more energy, & stronger resilience. Along with moving our bodies, the food we eat can also have an impact on not just our physical, but mental health, as well. In an article featured on centerforanixetydisorders.com it states: “the risk of depression increases about 80% when you compare teens with the lowest-quality diet, or what we call the Western diet, to those who eat a higher-quality, whole-foods diet”, reports Drew Ramsey, MD, an assistant clinical professor at Columbia University. He goes on to note that, “the risk of attention-deficit disorder (ADD) doubles.” Make it a family affair and find time to cook & exercise with your child(ren). Walks are always nice! If it allows, bring them in on the things that relax you. Whether it’s yoga, listening to worship music, praying, journaling, etc. 

“Do More of What Makes You Happy” - As a parent, it can be easy to kind of forget about yourself and prioritize you. But as the saying goes, “You can’t pour from an empty cup.” Maybe it’s doing more skincare masks, enjoying a nice bubble bath, relaxing and reading a good book, or grabbing a quick bite to eat with your favorite gal pals. Whatever it is that fills your tank, try to make time to do more of that. 

Be Your (and Their) Biggest Cheerleader - I’m a big advocate for celebrating small wins. Every step of the journey counts, and it’s those “small” wins that lead up to the big ones! This is a great attitude to adopt, as your child will learn how to cheer themselves on and encourage themselves, even when no one else does. Of course, you’ll always be cheering for them, but it’s important for them to know, “You’re a big deal, even if no one else tells you so.” 

Surround Yourself with Positivity - From the company you keep, to the songs you listen to, the shows you watch, books you read, how you choose to spend your free time, etc. - believe it or not, all those things can have a positive or negative influence on you. And that can determine your attitude and how you show up in the world, as a person, spouse, parent, etc. Get rid of everything and everyone that doesn’t bring you any good. And start replacing those things with positivity, and observe the way your mind transforms, then your actions, so on and so forth, to the point where you start to feel like a brand new person. 

I hope this was helpful and encouraging. Don’t forget to check out the various linked articles for more insight and helpful tips!



Khiari Mcalpin